Now I LOVE Disney! Who doesn’t! But I’ve started to notice how much influence this has had on my life, they’re all trying so hard to find their ‘one true love’ Think about it for a second...
The Little Mermaid - She ran away (well, swam) from home to be with her ‘one true love’
Cinderella - She went against the rules to go to a party to hopefully meet …. you guessed it her ‘one true love’
Why are their lives and stories centered around men? Is this part of the reason I've got it drilled into my brain that I need a man to be happy? I always thought that it was better to be with someone than to be lonely and single; it's part of the reason I've been a serial monogomist for about 10 years. Now that I'm finally single, I know there's no way this is true. It's taken me a full year to get to this point but I'm finally happy being by myself. I learned a lot in this time and I'm now older and wiser and willing to share my wisdom with you. These tips are for all the women out there who are newly single and all those stuck in a relationship and scared to leave. It's all about being SINGLE!!!!
Tip #1 Love Yourself
Not in a passive-aggressive-Justin-Biebers-song 'Love Yourself' way, but actually, love yourself. Not only love, but empower yourself. Do the things you've always wanted to do. Dance around your bedroom to Beyoncé (oh wait, I already do that). Make it your mission to better yourself - not for anyone else, but because you are the most important person in your life. Get out there and live a lot just for yourself - hit the gym, read a book, go to a museum, learn a new skill, be creative. If you've got a passion, explore it! Love make up? Take a make up class and hone your craft. Love going out to restaurants? Learn to cook and gain a huge life skill. There's so much you can do to become a better person and being single is the perfect time to be selfish and work on you.
Tip #2 Build Relationships in Different Ways
It’s so easy to get drawn into the FOMO of 'Instagram relationships', that aren't real anyway. #couplegoals is rubbish and we all know 98% of Instagram is fake and just for the likes. Ignore the societal pressure of being in a relationship and just be there for you and the people who matter to you. Spend time with your family and friends. Have a girl’s nights in and family days out, capture the fun and #friendshipgoals or #familygoals on Instagram instead?
Top tip: grab the gang and some popcorn and watch the 90's classic chick flick, Never Been Kissed. Young Drew Barrymore and 90's fashion that's equally parts ridiculous and equally parts 'kinda want that'.
Tip #3 Don't Fear The Clock!
You, just like I, feel the undeniable pressure of the biological clock. It's a slow and dull tick but by you can really hear it. If you're 18, you'll have no idea what I'm talking about. If you're mid-20's, you feel me. I can't even begin to imagine anyone older (don't even). All I'm thinking is - shouldn't I have it all figured out in my 20's? Shouldn't I be settled down by now with marriage and kids on the cards? It's one of the worst part about being single.
When does my time run out? Realistically, it doesn't for another 12 years. I'm 23 and I've got a pre-teen's worth of time ahead of me to worry about that. Right now, I'm focusing on me. I need to learn to love myself, get my house in order, concentrate on my career and the rest will naturally come. I'm not stressing about things so far out of my control right now because if I can be happy on my own, that's all that matters right now.
So, I hope you've been inspired by my post on how to be single. Just drink the wine, buy the shoes and book the holidays. Stay up late, sleep all day and do anything and everything you want to do. You’ve got all the time in the world to just do you.