Any advice on telling the parents?! Started by: Nadine

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  • Nadine 9
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    I am 31 yet I am petrified of telling my Mum that I want to do this! I have finally told my boyfriend (he works away a lot and never seemed to be a right time) he was supportive so it has made me feel braver. Any advice is welcome!!

    Anonymous
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    +2

    I could do with the same. I don’t know if I’ll tell my parents – my mum cried when I got a tattoo. They just won’t understand x

    Sinead-x 2
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    I’m only 21 still live at home with my parents and they didn’t really understand why I wanted it. I started off joking about it for ages then gradually got more serious about it haha ??
    They will love you no matter what anyway so don’t worry xxxx

    Charlotte 31
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    I’ve told my mum but I still haven’t told my dad and my operation is on Wednesday! Haha.. I don’t quite know how to bring it up x

    Nadine 9
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    Ha yes I have a tattoo that she doesn’t know about and I don’t even tell her I use sunbeds! She is in no way a prude or anything like that but when it comes to your body and doing stuff to it she just doesn’t agree and I know I will get a lecture!

    Anonymous
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    I had consultations a few months previously so they were aware of that. When I came home from consultation with the surgeon I had I told mum all about it. She told dad and he has barely ever mentioned it to me! They know I’m incredibly stubborn though and nothing they could say would have stopped me! Give them the info books you have been given cos having some knowledge helps. I also showed mum me in a bra with the rice test so she understood I wasn’t going massive. That helped too. Good luck I’m sure it will go better than you think ?x

    Abbie 13
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    I was in the same situation, I just told my mum I was going to a consultation about it to find out some more. She said I was perfect how I was but I just explained how I feel inside and she understood and just wanted me to be happy. I’m also 32 so I think I found it harder because I’ve not been used to telling parents things like this for a good few years now. My Dad doesn’t know still! ( I had mine done on 20 Aug!)

    Missrichi 6
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    Hi Hun I had been telling my mum for months if not years that I was not happy with my breast. So when i had my meeting with my pc it wasn’t hard tell her. She was very supportive and helped all the was with my recovery.
    I think you should just tell her your plans and why you are doing it. Be prepared to tell her your research so she’s at ease. Be honest very quickly so she feels part of life.

    It will be ok. My mum even came back to the clinic yesterday to have my strapping changed. You’ll be fine.
    All she will want is for you to be ok.

    Christine 14
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    Nope lol I’m 36 and haven’t told mine !

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    Lol my mum was the one who told me to get a tattoo… And now boob job lmao x

    Anonymous
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    There is still a bit of a stigma around cosmetic surgery but so many women get boob jobs and feel much better for it!

    It is a personal choice and people should respect that. If you will be happier and more confident that is all that matters. I was worried for a while about being judged but I was so surprised with the amount of support received! My mum came round to the idea and my boyfriend was on board from the start.

    Just tell her you’re considering breast augmentation and that you feel you’d benefit from it and you’ll feel happier and more confident. Also say her support is important to you.

    Good luck and don’t worry!this is a big step! Xx

    myamoderator 138
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    Hi Nadine,
    Maybe this MYA Blog will help.

    http://www.mya.co.uk/parent-partner-guide/

    Love MYA Mod
    x

    Sophie 25
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    @nljbean hiiii,, I came home frm shopping (holiday shopping) and was really sad (as I used to cry in the changing rooms with a bikini on hahaa) and sat with my mum until she asked me what was wrong then I just said I was really fed up and explained how I felt and we both got very emotional but to my surprise she was soooo supportive and I was totally shocked she understood and has been so good with me since having mine done! good luck hun!! xxx

    Chelsea 5
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    Hey,
    I found it so hard to tell my parents, I told them 2 months ago now, my op is on the 9th september,
    My mum hates tattoos and anything to do with changing your body, when I got my first big tattoo I wasnt allowed at home for 3 weeks. My dad doesnt really get involed with things like that so I wasnt as scared to tell him.
    It took a lot ans I kept putting it off so in the end I just blurted it out and cried, ide got myself so worked up, I couldnt hold it in, I wanted them to take me seriously, it was a struggle at first but once I calmed down I explained my reasons and we agreed that as parents they are never going to think you need to change yourself, you will always be perfect to them, they have learnt to be more supportive with it and as much as I know my mum hates the idea shes trying her best to support me and has even said she will come with me.

    It will be fine, they learn to accept it even if they dont at first at the end of the day they love you and just want you happy

    Sorry for the essay!!

    xx

    Beckii 50
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    I’m 23 haven’t told my parents either and my op is booked. My mums the same as many others on here hates tattoos etc and dosent see the need to change yourself as in their eyes we are perfect the way we are. Needless to say it didn’t stop me with tattoos I got them anyway told her afterwards (hid one for over a year when I was 18) then she just had to accept it and realised that whole time I had my tattoo I was still me lol.

    Things are a little awkward as my soon to be in laws know and my parent don’t but I felt I needed to tell my mother in law as she is the head receptionist for my local GP … Thought it was better she found out through me than through MYA contacting the surgery. She’s been nothing but understanding … My father in law is accepting but can’t understand why I would choose to have surgery when many people don’t get the choice.

    Don’t know why but telling them was much easier then telling my own parents …. Think il tell my parents really close to the time or just after I’ve had it done and hope they will understand that I’m doing this for me

    Paige 10
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    I was the exact same, my mum also cried when I got a tattoo so I never wanted to tell her,
    My boyfriend is a body builder and wasn’t until I reolised his “boobs” were bigger than mine that it really started bothering me.
    I told my mum when she had a wine and her friend round, couldn’t help but cry but that’s how I felt, I stood and took off my top and she totally understood and went with me for my consultation, she knew how insecure I was because I didn’t go out with my friends for a good year or more, I was too focused on running and Bootcamps to try and make myself better.
    Doing this has totally brought back my confidence, the week after my op my mum took me shopping and she picked me out lots of clothes in a gorgeous little boutique that I wouldent ever have even looked at before and welled up when I tried them on because I felt amazing,

    When you want something and you know it is for you then they will totally understand.
    My dad was abit concerned but they are bound to be!

    Hope you find it ok telling them xx

    Codey 2
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    I have only told my partner, sister in law and my best friend (who came with me to consultations) im not going to tell anyone as they will question things ”oh you don’t need it done ” etc yet they don’t know or understand your own personal struggles – im going to get it done and if they notice then fine if not then great – do it for yourself and no one else xx im getting married in December so guess people will notice then ha x

    Louise 6
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    My mum came to all the consultations with me but I still haven’t told my Dad and my op is in a week and a half, it just never seems the right time

    Anonymous
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    I had my op six days ago babe !
    My parents (who I live with) still havn’t noticed
    They were on holiday the day of my op . I stayed at my aunties for a couple of days before returning home.
    It is something I have ‘jokes’ about doing for years but I don’t think they ever thought I’d seriously have the funds or guys to do it … And like many others they are on the stricter scale of parenting e.g tattoo/piercing haters etc . It kills me because I really wanted my mum there with me but I couldn’t risk her kicking off before the op I was under enough stress as it was. I had 350 cc unders and I’m currently hiding them under a dressing gown but you really can’t notice it’s crazy !!! Good luck lovely xxx

    Ro 3
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    I told my mum and dad and wish I hadn’t! I was planning on getting it done and then just being like hey I have new boobs but someone talked me into telling them and when I did my mum said she’d wished I hadn’t because now she’s just going to worry! Just trust your instincts.. And at the end of the day it’s your body and your happiness! Good luck ? xxx

    Emma
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    At first my mum was totally against the idea, she said why would I want a ‘foreign’ object in my body, it wasn’t until I explained why (and got incredibly upset!) and told her how much they bothered me that she understands, she came to my first MYA consultation and now she’s on board!
    I thought my dad would go crazy, he hates it when I dye my hair let alone get surgery! But he was actually fine and quite supportive as he could see how much it affected me.
    I wouldn’t say either are ‘happy’ with my decision but they’re supportive. Also I literally just blurted it out to my mum one day (after not saying anything for 5 years!) I had to get it out! Then she helped me tell my dad a few weeks later.
    You might be surprised at their reaction, I was! Good luck xx

    Glenn 9
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    I had tubular breasts and trying to convince my mum that my breasts were not ‘normal’ and hadn’t grown properly proved hard. She kept going on about how small didn’t matter. In the end I just showed her! (Which was a BIG deal.. I found it hard enough showing the surgeon!) and then she understood completely and supported me ever since. I don’t know what the relationship between you and your mum is like but if it helps to physically show her then that’s an idea 🙂 x

    Alex Louise 18
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    I haven’t got the bottle to tell mine. My mum was completely disgusted when I got a tattoo. I think she just goes out of her way to be against any life choices I make. I really don’t know what to do even if I tell her how uncomfortable I feel with my size now and that I’ve been thinking about it for a very long time she still will not understand in the slightest. Even the possibility she may just stop speaking to me 🙁 xx

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